Start building lasting wealth in 9 (often missed) steps.

How to Say No to Friends When You Have Goals

When Ya Need to Say No to Ya Friends

It’s hard to say no to friends and family when they ask us to do something that’s not in our budget. It’s actually one of the most common questions we get when we do public speaking about How to Live Fabulously Not Fabulously Broke. For help specifically with paying off credit card debt, get the free 7-Step Credit Card Debt Slasher.

How can you say no to your friends?

If we let FOMO or “the disease to please” get us off track, we’ll never reach the financial goals we set for ourselves. So, how do we decline an invitation gracefully? How do we say no without losing the friendships that are most important to us?

On this episode of Queer Money, we share seven steps to get better at saying no, discussing how to turn down an invitation graciously and explain yourself in a way your friends will understand.

We challenge you to become the Julie Cruise Director of your friends’ group, proposing alternative activities that are cheap or free. Listen in for insight on saying no quickly, firmly and guilt-free—and learn how to stay committed to your financial goals as you pursue a fabulous life!

Listen for our 7 tips on how to tactfully say “no.”

Topics Covered

  • How trying to keep up with the gay community got us into debt
  • How social media exacerbates our desire to keep up with other’s Insta-worthy lives
  • Why it’s okay to treat yourself so long as you’re not sacrificing your financial wellbeing
  • 5 reasons why it’s hard to say no to friends and family
  • How FOMO and the disease to please make us say yes to things we can’t afford
  • 7 steps to get better at saying no to friends and family
  • Why it’s important to say no quickly and firmly
  • How to say no graciously and explain why you’re turning down an invitation
  • What it looks like to propose an alternative that’s free or cheap
  • Why it’s beneficial to practice saying no (without feeling guilty)


Resources from this episode:


Previous 3 Podcast Episodes


We’re David and John Auten-Schneider, the Debt Free Guys ( and hosts of the Queer Money® podcast. We help queer people (and allies) live fabulously not fabulously broke by helping them 1) pay off credit card debt, 2) become part- or full-time entrepreneurs and 3) save and invest for retirement.

Leave a Comment